satans-fabulous-blog:

morphingly:

brightredkettle:

are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes

with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks

That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.

punpun-kirakira:

patrickat:

nihilisticc:

So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.

This isn’t funny. That’s the gateway drug to a full blown marinara addiction. It’s good this was caught before this kid started hanging out at Olive Garden and sucking on every breadstick he can find to score another hit.

IT GOT BETTER.

mylilsunshine:

argentinian-idiot:

theblackship:

pokemonmasterkimba:

odbic:

IM SO DEAD.

there is some real inception shit happening here

there’s no way this is an accident

WHAT’S HAPPENING

Damn

I JUST-

basedona10000caloriediet:

kinzilauren:

maarkhoppus:

caucasianandwhite:

maarkhoppus:

fall out boy, paramore and justin timberlake on the iTunes top 10 charts wow hello 2006 

i wasnt even alive in 2006

why the fuck is a six year old on tumblr

ultimategeekchopper:

dies

pleatedjeans:

This is What Yahoo Bought With its $1.1 Billion (25 Pics)

dean-tacos-cas:

spookapple:

jackvessalius:

look what we have here

i have legitimately never laughed harder and for as long in my entire life

dovne:

zombikki:

veganasfuck:

how many “friend-zoned” guys does it take to change a light bulb? None they’ll just compliment it and get pissed when it won’t screw. 

this is the best joke ever